Growing as a Person

My Final Year at Fenn

This year hasn't been easy. I came from somewhat enjoying English last year to now sitting in my house in June of 2020 and loving it. I have grown in so many ways but it wouldn't have happened without my English teacher Fitz. He has many phrases that I have no clue where they are from but they just make sense. For an example, "90% of life is just simply about giving a dam and showing up!"

I learned that although I might not like or enjoy everything that I do in life, I should still persevere through it because I will likely take away something and if not, then at least I proved to myself that I can persevere through things that are hard, boring and that I just don't want to do.

Another thing that I learned this year is how to write a good story. Before this year, I hated writing about anything. However, with Fitz's planner that really breaks down the sections, I learned it is not about how much you write and the big picture, however the small picture and the way your story flows. With this, I felt I was not able to write much longer essays and stories, however much more detailed and interesting stories. In addition to that, Fitz's taught me to write about how you feel and what you are passionate about. One example where I really applied this was the essay of how we could improve Fenn. Although it was hard at first, after brainstorming some ideas, I had written 500 words before I knew it. Writing this essay taught me that anyone can be a good writer you just have to have something to believe in.

One final lesson and definitely the most important lesson is that you need to sell your writing to the reader. If you put a half-hearted effort in, people won't read past the first paragraph. However, if you write what you really feel and how you want the reader to appreciate the story, chances are that you will get the feedback that you were looking for. While this may have taken me more effort, it has taught me that people really can see the effort you put in.

Through success and failure and many many many essays, I am glad to have been in Fitz's English class this year and to have grown as an English student. It definitely taught me that you have to work hard and show effort however not all "work" has to be boring and that you can turn things and make it fun.

Life Lessons

How I Have Learned Through Experience

“Short cuts make long delays.” - Unknown

Life has never been easy for me. People are constantly coming and going, I have moved schools almost every 2 years, and half the time I have no clue what on earth I am doing. This may make you think I am a train wreck, and while not everything goes as I have planned it. I have learned a lot through all the changes and mistakes that have happened.

One of the most important things that took me the longest time ever to learn was to live in the moment. I am a planner and still today I am always thinking about whats the next big thing in life. However, I try to appreciate the little things a lot more and the down moments. I learned that not everything has to be big and high on life and crazy and that although those times look great for my Instagram and to laugh back on. The moments that are a lot more chilled out have more of an impact on me and I will always cherish them down the line and after the experience is over.

Another thing that I have learned and believe in life by experiencing it constantly and having to embrace it is changing. I gave a senior reflection on it this year simply because no matter who you are you have to expect it to happen in some way shape or form. For myself, it happened so constantly that my outlook on it is constantly changing along with the change. Right now and this ties back to living in the moment, the biggest thing I would say about it is to have a positive outlook on it. Life is not easy so as human beings when something good is happening to us we love is and try to embrace it and hold onto it as long as we can. So usually when change comes, it is seen as a burden or something sad that has to affect us so much, which then puts us in a negative mindset towards what's new to come. However, I like to have my little pity party and then have a positive outlook. Most of the time when change is occurring or going to occur it will end up with you as a happier person. Sure during the moment, it may not be what you want, however, we all have to take challenging and difficult steps in order to reach the light at the end of the tunnel. People have told me and I haven't realized it till recently that everything happens for a reason and it truly does. We all have to take hardship in order to have what's good.

One final life lesson and belief that I have learned from experience is to put yourself out there and put your nerves aside. Since last year I have been dealing a lot with anxiety and doing simple things like going up to give a senior reflection wanted to make me collapse. However, all these situations that I didn't want to do, I ended up getting forced into someone that cares about me, and to be honest I couldn't be more thankful for that. Most of the time the experiences I have been thrown into have been lifechanging like my youtube and learning how to fly catch on the flying trapeze at camp. While some like public speaking or confronting people in the heat of the moment has been hard to do, its something that I am pushing myself every day to work on.

With all things considered, life is NOT easy and everyone has a different experience. However, through all the experiences and beliefs I have learned some important life lessons that I would never give up on and will continue to follow for a long way to come.

Reading Log

Fitz's Walden

Reading Session #1 

Interesting Quotes…

“As long as possible live free and uncommitted. It makes but little difference whether you are committed to a farm or the county jail.”
“I should not obtrude my affairs so much on the notice of my readers if very particular inquiries had not been made by my townsmen concerning my mode of life,”
“The greater part of what my neighbors call good I believe in my soul to be bad, and if I repent of anything, it is very likely to be my good behavior. ”

Brief Metacognition…

So far I have really enjoyed reading Fitz's Walden. I tried reading Walden once in 6th grade and hated it. This version of it, however, has not only taught me a lot but also allowed me to learn about my English teacher's history and life before Fenn. It also made me realize that I have a lot to connect with him through our huge differences.

Reading Session #2 

Interesting Quotes…

“Others have been curious to learn what portion of my income I devoted to charitable purposes; and some, who have large families, how many poor children I maintained. I will, therefore, ask those of my readers who feel no particular interest in me to pardon me if I undertake to answer some of these questions in this book.”
“Most men, even in this comparatively free country, through mere ignorance and mistake, are so occupied with the factitious cares and superfluously coarse labors of life that its finer fruits cannot be plucked by them.”
“Here is life, an experiment to a great extent untried by me;”

Brief Metacognition…

I am still really enjoying reading Fit's Walden. It really shows what a humble person he is which is why I put in the first quote as it really shows that in life you don't need much, really apart from yourself.

Reading Session #3

Interesting Quotes…

“None of the brute creation requires more than Food and Shelter.”
“ I hewed the main timbers six inches square, most of the studs on two sides only, and the rafters and floor timbers on one side, leaving the rest of the bark on, so that they were just as straight and much stronger than sawed ones.”
“ I set up the frame of my house. No man was ever more honored in the character of his raisers than I. They are destined, I trust, to assist at the raising of loftier structures one day. ”

Brief Metacognition…

This section that I read, about Fits building his house taught me about hard work. He didn't have much, and he did it all by himself. It also taught me about grit and determination. Fitz wanted his house and so because of that, he built it.

Reading Session #4 

Interesting Quotes…

“My imagination carried me so far that I even had the refusal of several farms- the refusal was all I wanted- but I never got my fingers burned by actual possession.”
“As long as possible live free and uncommitted. It makes but little difference whether you are committed to a farm or the county jail.”
“The only house I had been the owner of before, if I except a boat, was a tent,”

Brief Metacognition…

In this reading, the second and third quotes that I put really spoke to me. The second one really spoke to me because I love summer and am not as big of a fan of school. I feel that in summer, you control your destiny and what you want to do. So seeing that quote made me think of summer and camp. The third quote spoke to me because it shows that you have to work for what you want in life and not everything comes easy.